There was a period in my life where time stood still. I became depressed about things that were completely out of my control. I was faced with having to deal with things I didn’t want to. Forced into wearing a label. My identity was changing, and I no longer knew who I was. I had succumbed to the darkest of places within me. I freely entertained every negative thought pattern.
Sitting beneath the weight of my depression, was the thought that I had to move forward in some way, because I was merely existing. I needed to save myself from myself. I could not recognise myself.
I decided to take myself on an achievement journey. Recall every accomplishment from a child to present-day. Become nostalgic of the process of before and after the goals were met. Remind myself of what I was capable of and reopen my mind to what was still possible.
I had to look in the mirror and have conversations with myself. I had to ask myself some difficult questions such as “Why don’t you love me anymore?” and “When did you fall out of love with me?”. I watched the tears fall as I gave my answers. I had to sit in my truth and own it. Decide who I wanted to be and how I wanted to be loved and what I was willing to accept despite the life changing challenges I had been faced with. I stopped looking at what I couldn’t do by considering everything I could. I went to therapy. I listened to motivational speakers. I read books. I wrote. I began to find myself through my interests. Each new finding leading into something better and a new opportunity. I began to find every positive in the adversities I was facing.
One evening, when reflecting upon my day, I noticed I had spent the entire day in a positive frame of mind. I noticed that every action I made and every interaction I had was solely for me and part of a greater purpose of what I wanted for my life. That was the day I realised my self-worth and the day I became unstoppable!